


Everlong

by fraudulentzodiacs



Category: Roswell New Mexico (TV 2019)
Genre: M/M, Time Travel, Time Travel Fix-It
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-04
Updated: 2019-04-04
Packaged: 2020-01-04 22:18:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,687
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18352832
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fraudulentzodiacs/pseuds/fraudulentzodiacs
Summary: Alien tech sends Alex ten years into the past, and he has an opportunity to undo some of his biggest mistakes.





	Everlong

“You...have an underground lair.”

 

Michael rolled his eyes with his back to Alex. 

 

“It’s not a lair, it’s a lab.”

 

“Sure.” Alex replied, unconvinced. “Just like my dad’s bunker is just an office.”

 

“ _ Don’t _ compare me to him.”

 

Alex turned away from the diagrams littering the wall at that. Michael still had his back turned to him, his shoulders hunched over and tight. Alex sighed and moved closer to the other man, hesitantly placing a hand between his shoulder blades. 

 

“I’m sorry.” Alex whispered, and Michael’s shoulders relaxed. Everything was still tense and unresolved, despite the fact that Alex was now in the know about the big alien secret. Between Isobel and his father, they hadn’t had time to talk about anything between them. Even if they had had the time, Alex wasn’t sure where to start. He had ruined things between them time and time again, and he wasn’t sure if he even deserved a second chance from Michael. They were trying for friends, at his request, but he had never been just friends with Michael and it was more difficult than he had expected. 

 

Michael sagged against the table, and Alex stepped into the space behind him, his hand slipping down Michael’s back until he could wrap both arms around his waist. He buried his face in the back of Michael’s neck, breathing in his skin as he felt Michael shudder beneath him. 

 

“I’m sorry.” Alex apologized again, his lips moving softly against Michael’s neck. “You’re nothing like him. You’re everything that he isn’t.”

 

They stayed like that for what felt like hours, their breathing in time as Alex clung to Michael, nuzzling his face in Michael’s curls as Michael’s arms joined Alex’s around his waist, lacing his fingers through Alex’s as he tried to pull him even closer

 

“Alex…” Michael whispered. “What are we doing?”

 

“I don’t know.” Alex admitted. “I just know that I want to be here with you.”

 

“You can’t do this. You can’t push me away and tell me you want to be just friends, then keep me close when you feel like it.”

 

“I’m not, I just…”

 

“What do you want Alex?”

 

“What do you want?” Alex countered back, and Michael pushed away, disentangling himself from Alex’s hold. 

 

“What I want doesn’t matter.”

 

Alex felt tears burning in his eyes as Michael threw his own line back in his face. He looked away, his gaze focusing on a piece of tech from the ship at the far side of the room. It glowed like the piece of the ship that Alex had found in the cabin, but it pulsed as if it was calling to Alex. 

 

“What is that?” He asked, moving away from Michael and toward the object. 

 

“What?” Michael’s sounded distracted, and he followed Alex’s gaze to the object before he shrugged. “Something from the crash, I’ve never been able to make it work. Hey, don’t-”

 

Whatever Michael was going to say was lost as Alex’s vision went white. He felt a pull in his stomach as if he was falling, though at the same time he felt completely still. Almost as soon as it began, it was over and Alex was standing in the lab again, only it looked completely different. Alex took a deep breath and nearly coughed up a lung from the dust that filled the room. The lighting, tech, and equipment that Michael had set up were all gone. Instead, Alex could only see dusty, haphazardly stacked boxes in the dim light coming from the single bulb above him. He fished his phone out of his pocket and turned on the flashlight, scanning the room but still finding nothing familiar except for the ladder leading outside. 

 

“Guerin?” He tried fruitlessly, knowing that he was alone in the bunker. Alex sighed and moved toward the ladder, pocketing his phone so he could climb up to the entrance. When he reached the hatch, however, the lever refused to budge. Alex tamped down his initial panic, forcing himself to breathe as he fought away the thought that he was trapped. He held onto the ladder with one hand while he wiggled the lever loose, resting his forehead against the top rung of the ladder when it unlocked. He pushed against the hatch, hearing a loud scraping above his head as he pushed against whatever was sitting on top of the entry to the bunker. 

 

Once he was finally able to throw the hatch open, Alex scrambled out, taking a deep breath as he glanced around the junkyard. It looked familiar, except that it was missing Michael’s Airstream. 

 

“What the hell?” Alex muttered. He pulled out his phone again, groaning when he saw that he had no signal. His car was also nowhere to be found. He kicked the ground in frustration before he pointed himself in the direction of town. His leg already ached at the thought of walking for miles on his prosthetic. As he neared the entrance, a truck pulled up in front of him, the old green Ford vaguely familiar from spending hours at the junkyard with Michael. 

 

“Mr. Sanders?”

 

“Alex Manes?” The old man asked, eyeing him up and down. “What are you doing out here?”

 

“I, uh...I was looking for Michael Guerin?”

 

“He’s not scheduled to work today, sorry kid.” Sanders replied. “Do you need a ride into town?”

 

“Yes, thank you.” Alex replied, slipping into the passenger seat. He turned to find Sanders staring at him, watching him warily. 

 

“You look different. What happened to all the piercings?”

 

“Piercings? I took those out years ago.”

 

“I just saw you last week, kid.” Sanders replied, shaking his head. “You look...older, I guess. Or maybe I’m just getting old.”

 

Alex looked over at Sanders, taking in a face that seemed less worn than the last time he had seen him at the junkyard. Where Sanders thought that Alex looked older, to Alex to other man looked years younger, the lines on his face less deep, his eyes clearer. It was unnerving, and it made Alex even more concerned about what had happened when he his hand had met the alien tech. 

 

It wasn’t until he arrived at the Crashdown, that Alex felt the ground fall out from under him once again. The diner was closed, but Alex could see through the window the familiar memorial Mr. Ortecho had set up after Rosa’s death. His breath caught in his throat as he stared at the pictures of Rosa with Liz, Arturo, and her mom that covered the altar. Alex tore his gaze away from the diner to inspect the rest of the downtown area. It looked much the same as it had when Alex had driven through it that morning to meet Michael, but upon closer inspection there were little things that were different - and familiar. 

 

Alex stumbled down to the newspaper dispenser on the corner, and gasped when he saw the date on the front page…

 

_ August 5, 2008 _

 

Two months after Rosa’s death.

 

Two months after Jesse attacked Michael. 

 

One week after he ended things with Michael. 

 

Three days before he left for basic. 

 

Alex leaned against the wall of the nearby building, forcing himself to keep his breathing even as his mind raced with the possibilities. There were really only two options. One, he was hallucinating and this was all some kind of horrible nightmare. Two, the tech he had touched in Michael’s bunker had somehow thrown him back in time. 

 

Crap.

 

He had traveled back in time. 

 

He was going to  _ kill _ Michael when he got back. 

 

He slipped away into a side alley, away from view. If he had only traveled ten years into the past, then he would be easily recognizable to many of the town’s residents, like Sanders. He needed to stay out of sight, and try to find a way home as quickly as possible. The bunker was the most obvious choice. If he was going to get home, his best bet was to activate the alien tech again and hope that it sent him back to his own time and not even further back. But, the only person he knew who knew anything about alien technology….was Michael. Who, at this point, was eighteen and heartbroken and forever changed by what happened that night in the shed. Not only that, Alex remembered just how angry Michael was at him at this point in their lives. He had begged Alex not to enlist, to run away to LA or Nashville with him. It was the only time Alex had ever seen Michael cry, as he realized there was nothing he could say to change Alex’s mind. That heartbreak had quickly turned to anger, and Alex could easily recall how it had felt when Michael had lashed out at him in the days leading up to him leaving. It had been awful and now he was going to have to relive it all again - this time while also confronting Michael with the revelation that he knew what he was. 

 

He knew that Michael was still living out of his truck at this point, a few years away from buying the Airstream. He was working the graveyard at one of the local grocery stores when he wasn’t working at Sanders, so Alex pointed himself in the general direction of the store. He stuck to the back alleys and side streets when he could, which worked out because he emerged from the alley at the back of Wilson’s, where he could see Michael moving merchandise from the truck to the warehouse. Alex was struck by just how young Michael looked, with no scruff and a leaner build. He was exactly how Alex remembered him, and he felt his heart constrict as he thought of the darker, damaged Michael he knew in the present. He loved both versions of Michael Guerin, but the thought of what could have been if their circumstances had been different made it hard for Alex to breathe. Still, the longer he was stuck in the past the worse things could get, so there was no point in putting off asking for Michael’s help. He stepped out of the alleway toward the dock, waiting until he was close enough Michael where he didn’t have to yell for him. 

 

“Guerin.” He greeted, and he watched Michael freeze before he turned to face him. His face went from anger to shock to confusion before he finally sent him a wary glare. 

“Alex?”

 

“Yeah, uh, sort of.” Alex shuffled, staring at the ground. “We need to talk.”

 

“You look different.” Michael grumbled, grabbing a box from the truck and tossing it in the direction of the warehouse. “Daddy finally get you to lay off the guyliner?”

 

“I need to talk to you, Guerin. In private.”

 

“I think we’ve said all that we need to say.”

 

“No we haven’t, not about this.”

 

“About what?” Michael snapped, exasperated. He looked at Alex expectantly, hands on his hips as he stared down at him. Much like the Michael in the present day, Alex found that he made him feel like a teenager again, which made it all the more awkward because this Michael  _ was _ a teenager, and so much like Alex’s memory of him that it made him physically ache. 

 

“We need to talk about the fact that I’m not your Alex. We need to talk about the fact that I’m twenty-eight years old, and a piece of alien tech from  _ your _ secret underground lair threw me back in time  _ ten years _ .”

 

Michael stared down at him, frozen, until his gaze darted around the area, looking for anyone who could have overheard them. He jumped down from the dock and jogged over to Alex, studying him as if looking for proof that he was lying. 

 

“How do you-”

 

“Know that you’re an alien? You told me.”

 

“When?”

 

“About six hours ago. Or, ten years from now I guess, depending on your perspective.”

 

“Wh-time travel? Really?” 

 

“You’re the expert on alien tech, not me Guerin.” Alex snapped, running his hand through his hair. “All I know is I touched something in the lab and all of a sudden it’s 2008.”

 

“We need to talk about this somewhere...not here.”

 

“Do you have your super-secret lair in this time?”

 

“It’s not a lair, Alex, it’s a lab.” Michael argued, and Alex’s mind was suddenly filled with thoughts of  _ his _ Michael, of crowding into his space in the lab, so much tension and want and  _ love _ between them that Alex felt panic at his desperation to get back to his own time and make things right between them. 

 

“Let’s go.” Michael continued, gesturing toward his truck. Alex nodded and climbed in the passenger seat, the truck achingly familiar to him both in the past and present. They rode in silence until they were near the outskirts of town, when Michael finally spoke. 

 

“What’s the future like?”

 

“Rule number one of time travel. Telling you may change things irrevocably.”

 

“Things that good, that you wouldn’t risk changing them?”

 

“I didn’t say that.” Alex stared out the window as they descended into silence again. 

 

“Did you enlist?” Alex thought hard for a moment, before deciding that he had made a resolution in the present not to lie to Michael anymore, and that still applied even though he was in the past. 

 

“Yes.”

 

“You get injured?” He asked, and Alex raised an eyebrow until Michael shrugged. “You walk different than my Alex.”

 

Alex stared at him for a long moment before he leaned down and pulled up his pant leg, exposing his prosthetic. Michael didn’t reply, but Alex could see the pain in his eyes and rolled his pants back down. 

 

“Does it hurt?”

 

“Sometimes. Not as much now that I’m used to the prosthetic.” Alex’s eyes drifted to Michael’s hand, still bandaged from the night in the shed. “You should really get that looked at.”

 

“You know the truth about me, you know why I can’t.”

 

Alex stared at him, but finally conceded. Ten years from now, they had Liz and Kyle for medical aid. But in 2008, there really wasn’t anyone they could trust except for each other. 

 

“At least let me re-wrap it for you when we get there. I had some field training.”

 

“Yeah, okay.” Michael replied before slipping his hand out of sight. 

 

“This is what you touched?” Michael asked as Alex stood in front of the tech and nodded. “I’ve never been able to figure out what it does. I thought it might be part of the engine.”

 

“The engine of a TARDIS, apparently.” Alex grumbled, and Michael chuckled. 

 

“I always suspected you were a closet nerd.”

 

“So, do you think if I touch it again, it’ll send me back?”

 

“I honestly don’t know, dude. Half the stuff in here? I have no idea what it does.”

 

“Well, I guess it’s worth a shot. What’s the worst that can happen?” Alex asked, staring at the tech. 

 

“Uh, you could get thrown back a hundred years? A thousand?”

 

“I can’t stay here. I already exist here.”

 

“Yeah.” Michael replied, staring at the ground. “You do.”

 

“I’m sorry.” Alex blurted out. “I’m sorry for what I did - what I’m doing. I know it hurt you.”

 

“I know you shouldn’t tell me anything about the future, but can you tell me one thing?” Michael asked, and the pain in his eyes had Alex nodding before he could stop himself. 

 

“Do we work it out? In the future? Do you...love me?”

 

Alex stared at Michael, feeling those same fireworks in his chest that he always felt when he thought about his feelings for him. It was overwhelming and all-encompassing, and he could feel it in every atom in his body. There was no way he could bring himself to lie about how he felt, even if it affected the future.

 

“I love you more than I’ve ever loved anyone. You’re everything to me. Nothing that happens in the next ten years could ever change that.”

 

Michael let out a shaky breath at that, nodding. 

 

“Thank you.”

 

“I’ll see you around, Guerin.” Alex replied, reaching out to touch the tech. He expected that same flash, that same pull, but felt nothing. He looked back to Michael, who looked as equally confused. 

 

“I’m still here.” Alex’s tone was flat. “Why am I still here?”

 

“I don’t know.” Michael replied, eyeing the piece of tech. “Does it look any different than it did?”

 

“I don’t know!” Alex snapped. “It looks like alien tech, it always looks to same to me.”

 

Alex felt panic rising, his chest heaving as he thought about the fact that he might not be able to get back, that he might be stuck here reliving the past ten years. That he might never get back to  _ his _ Michael. 

 

“What do we do?” Alex finally asked after a long moment. 

 

“Give me a day or two to study this, see if I can find some way to bring it back online.”

 

“And what do I do for two days?”

 

“I don’t know dude! Lay low, don’t go back into town.”

 

“Great.” Alex grumbled, leaning against the table in the middle of the room as he glared at the piece of tech that was keeping him from returning home. 

 

Alex watched Michael work for as long as he could before he climbed the ladder out of the bunker, the sun low in the sky. He found one of the rusty old chairs that Michael still had in front of his Airstream in the present and collapsed in a heap. His leg was screaming in pain, and he knew that he had pushed it too far today. He slipped off the prosthetic with a relieved sigh and began to massage the skin around his stump, kneading the flesh with practiced ease. He felt marginally better by the time Michael emerged from the lab, watching him with concern. 

 

“You okay?”

 

“Yeah, just stood on it too long today.”

 

“I have a couple of theories about how to activate the time machine, but I won’t have anything solid until tomorrow.”

 

“Time machine?”

 

“You touched it and it sent you back in time ten years. Do you have a better name for it?”

 

“Fine, we can try again tomorrow.”

 

“Where are you going to sleep?” Michael asked, and Alex gestured to the chair he was sitting in.

 

“I’ve slept in worse places.”

 

“You can sleep in the lab.”

 

“No offense, Guerin, but considering what being in there did to me not twelve hours ago, I really don’t want to stay in there more than absolutely necessary.”

 

“Fair enough, but it’s too cold for you to sleep out in the open.” Michael replied, reaching into his truck bed and pulling out a rolled-up sleeping bag. “I’ve got an extra sleeping bag, you can bunk with me in the truck.”

 

Alex finally nodded, catching the sleeping bag Michael tossed his way as he moved toward the truck. 

 

“Do I at least get a nicer place to sleep in the future?” Michael asked as he pulled his own bag against one side of the truck. Alex chuckled and nodded. 

 

“I guess it depends on what your definition of nice is.”

 

“Something not on wheels.” Michael replied, and Alex bit his lip to keep from grinning. He would never admit it to Michael - any Michael - but he loved the Airstream. Almost everything good that had happened to him the past decade happened in or near Michael’s home on wheels. It was precious to him, in the way that most things he associated with Michael were sacred. 

 

Alex hopped onto the tailgate of the truck and removed his prosthetic, letting Michael place it in the cab of the truck for safekeeping as he scooted back to stretch across his sleeping bag. He tensed a little as he felt Michael climb into the truck bed, memories of too many nights they had spent together out in the desert, stargazing and holding onto one another as if their lives depended on it. He had to remind himself that the Michael next to him now wasn’t his - but, of course, neither was the one in his own time. Michael Guerin was always just far enough away to be out of Alex’s grasp. He reasoned, though, that the distance was of his own making. Michael had reached out for him a dozen times over the years, and Alex would take that hand only to push him away the moment things got too real or too overwhelming. When his father would get in his head and convince him that he wasn’t worthy of being loved, or that he would hurt Michael again if Alex didn’t let him go. He had never been willing to fight for Michael, even now. The Alex in this time was days away from leaving Roswell and Michael behind for basic, succumbing to his father’s wishes and irrevocably damaging his relationship with Michael forever. 

 

“I’ll find a way to get you home.” Michael promised, staring up at the stars. 

 

“I know you will. You’re the smartest person I know, in any time period.”

 

“Sweet talker.” Michael joked, and Alex chuckled. 

 

“When I get back, I’m going to remind you that you called me sweet.”

 

“Will I remember all of this?”

 

“I don’t know.” Alex admitted. “I guess so? But, if you do remember, that would mean you always did because I always traveled back. But you never told me. So, maybe not? Maybe all this is creating an alternate timeline from mine?”

 

“Time travel is confusing.” 

 

“Everything about us is confusing, why shouldn’t this be?”

 

“We aren’t together in the future, are we?” Michael whispered after a moment. “I know you said that you love me, but I can tell. It’s in your eyes when you look at me. It’s the same look my Alex gives me.”

 

“No, we’re not together.” Alex admitted, his voice shaky. 

 

“Why not?”

 

Alex stared up at the night sky for a long time. He could find any number of reasons - excuses - for why they weren’t together, but it really boiled down to one thing. 

 

“Because I’m afraid. And when I’m afraid, I push you away. Every time.”

 

“Well, now I know you’re the same as my Alex.” Michael quipped, and Alex let out a wet laugh. 

 

“But it doesn’t matter how many times I walk away. I’ve tried to stop loving you for the past ten years, and nothing works.” Alex didn’t know why it was easier to talk to this younger Michael, but he found himself feeling more honest than he had in years. “I just don’t know how to let myself be happy, I guess. And then I hurt you when I try.”

 

“How many times?” Michael asked, his voice heavy and full of emotion. “How many times will you walk away in the next decade?”

 

“Four.” Alex admitted, each memory seared into his brain permanently. “When I leave for basic in a few days. After my first deployment. Once, you came to see me in Colorado before the last time I went to Iraq. The final time was after this happened.” Alex gestured down to his missing leg. “I’m so tired of hurting you.”

 

“So, when we get you back, stop.” Michael replied. “If your Michael is anything like me, he’ll take you back no matter what. Show him you mean it this time. If my Alex gave me half a chance to make it work, I’d burn the world down to make it happen.”

 

Alex fell silent at that, and Michael seemed to settle too, turning over so his back was facing Alex. Alex continued to stare at the stars, unable to calm his thoughts. He knew in his bones that he loved Michael, that he was the only man he’d ever love. When - if - he got back, he would have to be brave. He’d have to make Michael see that things could be different. That  _ Alex _ could be different. Despite the military and his father and Michael’s true origins, nothing would change the fact that Michael was all that Alex had wanted since he was seventeen. 

 

Seventeen. 

 

Alex’s breath sped up as he thought about his theory that he was creating an alternate timeline by being in the past. If it was different from his own, then that meant that he could change things. He could fix things  _ now _ and prevent all the hurt he’d caused over the last ten years. He wasn’t sure if it was possible, but he knew that he had to try. Alex let out a shaky breath as he began to formulate a plan. He was going to do it for Michael, and for himself. 

 

He was going to change things for them. 

 

The next morning, he waited until Michael wasn’t paying attention to swipe his phone, finding this time period’s Alex in the contacts and shooting off a quick text. He slipped the phone back before Michael noticed, and then began to help him go over the research Michael had done the day before. 

 

“I think we can do this.” Michael declared, nodding his head. “I should be ready to send you back by the end of the day.”

 

“Great.” Alex replied, shooting the younger man a wide grin. 

 

A half hour later, Michael’s head popped up as a vehicle approached, his body going tense as he recognized Alex’s old Jeep. 

 

“You need to hide.” Michael warned, already pushing the pile of scrap covering the entrance to the lab aside with his mind. “Alex - my Alex - is here.”

 

“I know.” Alex admitted, taking a deep breath. “I asked him to come.”

 

“What? Are you crazy?” Michael snapped. 

 

“I may have borrowed your phone and texted him. You trust me, right?”

 

“I mean, not as much considering you swiped my phone and invited my very human ex-boyfriend out here to meet his future self.”

 

“I told you last night how terrible things have been for us. Trust me, please, I’m going to change things.”

 

Michael stared at him for a long moment before he sighed heavily and nodded. 

 

“Max and Iz are going to kill me.”

 

Michael and Alex waited until the younger Alex exited his car, and suddenly Alex remembered how much he had changed after the incident in the toolshed. The piercings and eyeliner were gone, but Alex could still see bits of black nail polish left on his hands. His dad had thrown away almost everything, but Alex had been able to stash away a bottle of polish that Michael had given him, the bottle precious in more way than one. Young Alex slowed as he neared them, his eyes narrowing as he spotted Alex. 

 

“I can explain…” Michael began, holding his hands out as he neared Young Alex. 

 

“That….that’s….” Young Alex shook his head, pulling his gaze from Alex to Michael. 

 

“It’s you.” Michael confirmed, glancing back at Alex. “From, uh...from the future.”

 

“What the f*ck.” Young Alex muttered. “What the hell is going on?”

 

“You should probably sit down.” Alex pointed to one of the patio chairs near the fire pit. “We’ve got a lot to talk about.”

 

“So...you’re an alien.” Young Alex repeated, and Michael nodded before Young Alex turned to Alex. “And you were sent into the past by a piece of alien technology.”

 

“Yeah.” Alex confirmed. 

 

“You’re taking this a lot better than I expected.” Michael admitted, and Young Alex scoffed. 

 

“I’m just in shock, give me time to make my way up to freaking out.”

 

“Guerin, don’t you think you should go down to the lab and get ready to send me back?”

 

“Yeah, yeah….” Michael replied, standing up. He paused and looked back at Young Alex, his face full of worry. “Are you going to be okay?”

 

“Uh-huh.” Young Alex nodded distractedly. 

Alex and Young Alex watched as Michael opened the hatch and climbed down the ladder, leaving the entrance open for them to follow. Once he had disappeared, Alex turned to face his younger self, who seemed a little more together now that Michael was gone. 

 

“Do you really think that he can get you back?”

 

“If anyone can, it’s MIchael.” Alex replied.

 

“You have a lot of faith in him.”

 

“I love him.” Young Alex’s eyes snapped up to him at that, and Alex shrugged. 

 

“Ten years later, you still…?” Young Alex began, and Alex nodded. 

 

“After all this time, I’ve had to accept the fact that loving Michael is a forever kind of thing. He’s it for me...for us.”

 

“So we, uh...we work things out?”

 

Alex sighed and looked back at the entrance hatch before facing Young Alex. 

 

“That’s actually why I tricked you into coming here. I mean, how often does someone get a chance to go back and change the biggest mistake of their lives?”

 

“What do you mean?” Young Alex looked nervous and uncomfortable, shifting in his seat as he stared at Alex. 

 

“In two days, you’re going to board the bus for basic, and in the process you’re going to break yours and Michael’s hearts. That decision, leaving him behind like that, it changes everything.”

 

“I have to go, you know that.” Young Alex snapped. “My dad…”

 

“I know, I remember.” Alex replied, the memory as vivid in his head now as it had been a decade earlier. His father’s face was crystal clear in his mind as he held Alex in his gaze, his tone even as he described all the ways he could hurt Michael if Alex didn’t do as he wanted. Alex knew that the military was dangerous, but he had always been more willing to risk his own safety than take the chance that Michael could be hurt, or worse. 

 

_ There’s a lot of desert in Roswell, son. Easy for a forgotten boy to get lost. _ His dad’s voice rang in his head, and Alex shook his head to rid himself of the voice. 

 

“I’m not saying don’t go.” Alex continued, taking the seat across from Young Alex. “The Air Force will change you, in good and bad ways. It’ll become part of who you are.”

 

Alex leaned over and rested his arms on his thighs, staring at his younger self, willing him to open his mind and heart and listen to him when he remembered clearly how broken he already was at this point. 

 

“I’m not saying don’t go.” He repeated. “I’m saying don’t leave Michael behind.”

 

“How?” Young Alex asked, his voice cracking with emotion. “How do I do that?”

 

“After i’m gone, tell him everything. Dad’s threats, your fears, all of it. Tell him that you love him, and make it work. Keep it quiet, but there’s hope. DADT will be repealed in a few years, and once you’re in the USAF, Dad will have less power over you.”

 

“I don’t know…” Young Alex argued, shaking his head. “What if…”

 

“It doesn’t matter.” Alex snapped. “Michael is all that matters. He’s everything, and you’ll spend the next ten years running from that fact if you don’t listen to me right here and right now. Trust me when I say that being loved by Michael Guerin is the best thing that will ever happen to us. Don’t make the mistakes that I did. Fight for him, fight for the both of you. I promise, it’s  _ worth it _ . I’m not promising that it will be easy, but I guarantee that it’ll be a lot easier than what I’ve gone through.”

 

Young Alex just stared at him, tears in his eyes. Alex prayed to a God he didn’t believe in that his younger self would take his advice. He stood up and stared down at the other Alex and nodded. 

 

“We should get down there.” He said, gesturing toward the hatch. Young Alex nodded and followed him down to the lab, where Michael was standing triumphantly near the time machine. 

 

“I think I’ve got it!”

 

“Told you he was brilliant.” Alex quipped over his shoulder, and he heard Young Alex scoff. 

 

“Yeah, I already knew that, thanks.”

 

“So, how do we do this?” Alex asked, and Michael stepped between him and the time machine. 

 

“Basically, I think it works on thoughts, kind of like telepathy between you and the time machine. All you have to do is think about here you want to go, and it should take you there.”

 

“Then why didn’t it work when I tried to go home last time?”

 

“I don’t know.” Michael shrugged. “Maybe you weren’t ready to go back yet? Maybe there was something in your mind keeping you here?”

 

Alex looked over his shoulder at his younger self and smirked. 

 

“Yeah, maybe. So, what, I click my heels three times and think ‘there’s no place like home’?”

 

“Something like that, yeah.” Michael laughed. 

 

“Alright, then.” Alex replied, turning to face Michael. “See you around, I guess.”

 

Michael looked wary for a moment before he launched himself at Alex, wrapping his arms around his shoulders and pulling him in for a hug. Alex wrapped his own arms around Michael’s waist, holding him tight. 

 

“Thank you.” Michael whispered. “You got him to come back.”

 

“He thought it was you, he came on his own.” Alex replied. “Be brave for him.”

 

“Yeah.” Michael replied, pulling away from Alex. 

 

“Bye, kid.” Alex said to Young Alex, who nodded. 

 

Alex turned back to the time machine and took a deep breath before he reached out. 

 

“Here goes nothing.”

 

He immediately felt that familiar pull, and then the bright white light filled his vision. He felt himself falling, and not a moment later he was in the lab again, the sight comfortingly familiar. He looked around for Michael, but the other man was nowhere to be found and everything in the lab was covered in tarps and dust cloths, even the pieces that Alex knew were out in the open before. He shook his head and moved over to the ladder, grabbing the first rung when he spotted the ring on his left hand. He froze, staring at the simple band on his finger. It shimmered slightly when he touched it, and Alex was suddenly reminded of the console Michael had shown him. 

 

As if seeing the ring was a trigger, Alex doubled over as sounds and images flooded his brain. Ten years of new memories invaded his psyche, side-by-side with the life he had already lived. These, however, were almost all centered around Michael. 

 

_ Moments after the future Alex had left, pulling Michael into his arms and telling him he loved him.  _

 

_ Two days later, leaving for Basic, catching Michael’s eye from across the bus station, knowing that he’d be back for him.  _

 

_ Six months later, returning home and driving straight to Michael’s Airstream, spending his week-long leave tangled up with him while successfully dodging his father at every opportunity.  _

 

_ Writing e-mail after e-mail during his first deployment, expressing every hope and fear and all the love he had for Michael even though they were thousands of miles apart.  _

 

_ Michael hauling the Airstream up to Colorado Springs during the eight months Alex was taking specialized courses at the Academy. The night before he was to return to Roswell, camping high up in the mountains, holding each other next to the fire as Michael promised that he was going to marry him one day.  _

 

_ Alex taking the good-natured ribs from his squad as he hung up a picture of him and Michael in his bunk after DADT was repealed. Promising Chad and Thompson and Esparza that he would introduce them the next time they were home on leave.  _

 

_ Returning from his second deployment to find Michael waiting for him at the airport, the other practically ready to burst as he watched Alex grow closer. Alex didn’t hesitate before throwing himself at his boyfriend, only then noticing Isobel, Max, and Maria - their family - waiting patiently behind them.  _

 

_ Leaning against Michael’s chest as they watched the news in the tiny apartment Alex shared with Esparza near their base, CNN recounting the court decision that would change their lives. “Marry me.” Michael whispered against his neck, and Alex smiled, leaning his head back on Michael’s shoulder. “Yes.” He replied, dropping a kiss to Michael’s cheek and feeling Michael’s grip around his waist tighten.  _

 

_ Nearly crying as Michael produced his ring from his pocket, the metal shining as he recognized the material. “It’s a piece of the console. I figure, if anyone’s going to keep it safe, it’s you.” Michael shrugged, and Alex grabbed him by the back of the neck, kissing him with all the love and passion and devotion he had in his body.  _

 

_ Standing in front of the judge in the courthouse, Max, Isobel, Maria, and Mama DeLuca watching as they exchanged vows and rings two weeks before his third deployment.  _

 

_ Bits and pieces of his last moments in Baghdad, and waking up six days later in Germany with his hand in Michael’s and his right leg missing. Michael right by his side over weeks of recovery and months of rehab, his patient with Alex never dwindling no matter how many dark words or random objects he threw his way - no matter how many times he begged his husband to leave him.  _

 

_ Returning to Roswell a little less than he was before, but Michael’s by his side and his family are waiting for him with a welcome home party at the Wild Pony. The city had wanted to throw him a parade, but Alex had refused despite his father showing up for the first time in years to try to convince him otherwise. That scene had ended with Maria punching his father in the face as Michael and Max shared smug, satisfied grins and Isobel offering to turn his brain into scrambled eggs.  _

 

_ Moving into the cabin with Michael that Jim Valenti had left him, their first real home together after years of living in different cities and countries.  _

 

_ Adopting Betty, the most adorable brown and white beagle that Alex had ever seen, rolling his eyes as Michael constantly referred to her as “our first kid.” _

 

Alex fell against the wall as his mind began to calm, his breathing heavy. He looked down at the ring again, a small smile growing on his face. He had done it. He had changed everything. It wasn’t perfect - his dad was still convinced that Michael and the Evans twins were the aliens he was looking for, Liz was still reeling from the knowledge that Isobel had killed Rosa - he got a flash of a memory of Liz confronting him about his knowledge of the cover up just a few weeks prior - and Iz was still in stasis in the pod. But, he had Michael, and Michael had him, and he knew that this future was better than anything he could have hoped for before he went back in time. He stood up straight and reached for the ladder again, climbing up and pushing open the hatch. 

 

Once he was back on solid ground, he looked up and found Michael staring at him from one of the lawn chairs around the fire pit, a beer dangling from his fingers. 

 

“Back from your little trip?”

 

“You remember that?”

 

“‘Course.” Michael replied, standing up and taking a swig from his beer. “I’ve only been waiting ten years for you to go back.”

 

“But did I go back? I mean, the other me went back, but I’m different now,  _ we’re _ different now. The whole timeline is different, so did I go or did he?”

 

“I don’t know.” Michael admitted, coming to stand in front of Alex and threaded his fingers through Alex’s with practiced ease. “I’m just glad it happened. This future better?”

 

Alex studied Michael’s face, so familiar that he could replicate every inch of the man he loved - the man he was married to. He wrapped a hand around Michael’s neck and pulled him down until their foreheads rested against each other. 

 

“It’s perfect.”


End file.
